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This is a paraphrase from Dale Carnegie in the How to Win Friends and Influence People book that's been around for almost a century.  In this post, I'll talk about what I mean and why it is the case as well as tell stories of the truthfulness of this.

Think about your name.  Your first, middle, last, maiden, married - whatever you like best.  Why do you like it most?  What does it mean to you?  What if someone pronounces or spells it incorrectly?

I know that we are all a little attached to our names.  Now, my name is my married name, but I think it's pretty cool to have a noun for a last name.  One time when a person heard my full name (oh, it was a radio game I played), they said it sounded l could be in adult videos.  Nonetheless, it's still my name and I plan on keeping it for the rest of my life.

Think about others' names.  I'm sure you've heard someone's name that has been hard for you to pronounce.  Many times, people living in a different country than they were born have nicknames, so people can call them something similar.  If YOU have one of those hard-to-pronounce names, how does it feel to have someone call you by your REAL name?  I bet pretty good.

I had a friend, OK, it was a guy I had a crush on in college, who always seemed to make it a point to learning peoples' hard to pronounce names.  I think he endeared himself to others by simply trying to learn someones' real name.  I admired that about him and have tried to do the same ever since.

I am an apartment manager as well as a coach, and there was one man who applied for an apartment who called himself George.  Turns out his real name was Jorge (pronounced "Horhe").  Think about those two names - they may be the same in two different languages, but they just don't feel the same when you say them.  Try it.

All I'm saying is that we all love to be called by our REAL names.  I think, just by other people trying to know us a little more, it makes us want to get to know them a little more.

I dare you - go up to someone who has a hard to pronounce name and ask them how to pronounce and spell their name.  Ask them its origin.  You will make a new best friend.

Lisa Starr
Life/ Corporate Coach
[email protected]




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